By James Bryan Smith
Jesus knew how important sexuality is, how it can destroy
life or enhance life. Unfortunately, it is often misunderstood, which
contributes to our problem with sexuality.
You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit
adultery.’ But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has
already committed adultery with her in his heart. Matthew 5:27-28
This passage has led many to believe Jesus is saying that simply
looking at a woman lustfully is the same as committing adultery. It certainly
appears that way. But a closer look reveals something different.
The word that is used for lust in this passage is epithumia. This word had a very specific
meaning. It does not refer to ordinary sexual attraction but to intentionally objectifying another person
for one’s own gratification. When I discuss this issue with students, I
describe it this way: Epithumia is
not referring to the first look but to the second.
The first look may be simple attraction, but the second look is leering. Lust
does not value the person but mere body parts.
Epithumia goes beyond mere sexual
attraction. It intentionally cultivates sexual desire for the sake of the
feeling itself. It is the opposite of love. Love looks into the eyes; epithumia steals glances below them.
Love values the other as a person; epithumia
degrades the other. We must make a clear distinction between attraction and
objectification, between feeling sexual desire and epithumia. When we fail to make the distinction, we adopt the first
false narrative and think that sexual attraction is evil in itself.
One day I was walking on the beach with my brother, engaged in a
deep conversation about God. A beautiful young woman in a bikini was walking in
our direction, and of course we both noticed her. When she passed by we looked
at each other and said, “Wow.” Now, had we sinned at that point? I don’t think
so. If we had not noticed, we would not be sexual persons. The response was
completely acceptable in my view. Now, had we turned and followed her, focusing
our eyes on her body, dreaming of a sexual encounter with her, we would have
sinned. We would have crossed over from simple sexual attraction to epithumia. But we didn’t.”
Taken from The Good and Beautiful
Life: Putting on the Character of Christ by James Bryan Smith. Copyright(c)
2009 by James Bryan Smith. Used by permission of InterVarsity Press PO Box 1400
Downers Grove, IL 60515. www.ivpress.com.
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