By Allen White
Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You clean the outside of the cup and dish, but inside they are full of greed and self-indulgence. Blind Pharisee! First clean the inside of the cup and dish, and then the outside also will be clean. Matthew 23:25-26
Pretending. We all pretend to one degree or another, especially on Sunday mornings. While we may not put on our “Sunday best” these days, we still put on.
“Good morning, how are you doing?” Rarely do we say, “I am completely overwhelmed. I feel my life is unraveling at the seams. My kids are out of control. Financially things are rocky, and my marriage is hanging by a thread.” If we responded like that, we would soon find ourselves at the disposal of the church’s counseling services.
As long as the outside looks all together, then the assumption is the inside is all together as well. Think about this: when you look around on Sunday morning, how many marriages do you believe are in trouble? Usually, we think: “Nobody has the problems that we’re having.” Everyone looks good.
So, why do we focus on the outside before we look at the inside? Because nobody can see the inside…yet. There will come a time when our troubled interior life will erode our pleasant façade.
How many times have we been surprised that someone who seemed to be doing so well suddenly plunges off the deep end? We never saw it coming. They never clued us in.
In the church we hear these altruistic conversations about inner beauty, then we apply another coat to the outside. Whether that’s literal or metaphoric, it’s still the same.
Rather than pretending to smile, what if we could tap into the joy that only comes from our relationship with God? Rather than acting like everything is okay, why don’t we spend time with the One who knows us inside and out and allow Him to touch those broken places?
You and I could have more than what we even pretend to have. We could have abundant life. We could have lives free of worry – rest in God’s care. We could have lives open to possibilities rather than burden by liabilities. We could have lives celebrating our abundance rather than fretting over what might have been.
Pretentious lives are exhausting. These lives separate us from others. After all, if they get too close, they’ll see our cracks.
Pretending won’t remove our pain. Pretending won’t hide our sin. Pretending won’t heal our wounds. Oh, and what’s going on inside of us is more obvious to others than we think. If you don’t believe me, ask your spouse, family members and friends.
As Rick Warren says, “Revealing the feeling is the beginning of healing.” Find a safe person in your life or at your church and talk about what’s going on. Journal about your thoughts and feelings. Cry out to God. Repent from pretending and allow God to help you face your reality.
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